Friday, July 13, 2018
10 Things Worthy of Our Intolerance1. Be Intolerant of Naysayers
Pursuing our dreams and reaching our goals are hard enough on their own. Trying to swim upstream as others throw rocks at us makes it unnecessarily harder. So be wary of sharing your goals with those who habitually doubt and criticize and put down. Wet blankets are wet blankets no matter what the relationship. Choose who you confide in wisely. Those who tolerate pessimism (from themselves or others) are those who volunteer to climb the mountain of life with one arm tied behind their back and one leg cut off. Still, don’t confuse pessimism with wisdom or prudence. Optimism is not intellectual laziness. Positive thinking does not grant absolution from responsibility or honest self-evaluation of your assets, abilities and commitment. It doesn’t excuse you from the hard work of preparation. Optimists still buy life insurance. But where pessimism itself is creating deep caverns of difficulty between you and your dreams, a quiet and respectful yet sturdy and firm intolerance may be the most appropriate response.
2. Be Intolerant of Hate
Don’t tolerate racist jokes and comments. Don’t accept hateful barbs thrown at you or others. Never look the other way or excuse the bully regardless of the bully’s background. To do otherwise is to enable and empower the hate, to turn your back on the bullied, give tacit approval to the intolerable behavior and abandon its object to a miserable fate. Don’t tolerate your own hate either. Hatred is a cancer that must be removed before it metastasizes into the bone marrow of your soul. But be careful not to accuse every disagreement as being motivated by hate. Be tolerant of opposing ideas even if intolerant of the hate that may motivate some who articulate them.
3. Be Intolerant of Dishonesty
Don’t accept lies. Period. Don’t tell them. Don’t accept them. Live your life in such a way as to not feel the need to hide behind them. Don’t allow others (or yourself) the opportunity to nestle into their own cowardice. That is, after all, what lying is. It’s an attempt to get around the consequences of our decisions. Or perhaps it’s a way to avoid the overreaction of someone close or who has authority over us. Even so, have the courage to let the person overreacting choose how to deal with an honest life, not a pretended one. Then have the courage to accept their response.
4. Be Intolerant of Hypocrisy
Do you expect from others what you don’t expect from yourself? Do you impose a set of rules on others you won’t accept as an imposition on you? That’s what hypocrisy is, you know. Hypocrisy is the act of living a lie, pretending to be something you’re not or requiring others to live by a set of rules you reject for yourself. If you tolerate hypocrisy from others, stop it! Demand an equal playing field. Anything less is a form of servitude. Refuse to be a slave to someone else’s unwillingness to treat you like an equal. But remember that hypocrisy is not the same as inconsistency or human frailty. We are all inconsistent at living up to all we value. Otherwise, we would be perfect – or would have no ideals, standards or values we would have to bother trying to live up to. So be decidedly tolerant of people inconsistently trying to live up to their values and intolerant of those who would hide behind their values or impose them on others while ducking the imposition themselves.
5. Be Intolerant of Excuses
Excuses are messy things. They squirm and whine and reshape themselves like playdough pushed into cracks and crevasses. They defuse and deny, weaken and stifle greatness. Stay away from the numbing poison of excuses. Providing reasons is not the same as giving excuses, though. Reasons give an accounting, while excuses justify. Reasons accept responsibility, while excuses seek to pin fault on someone else’s lapel. Reasons explain, while excuses try to divert attention and hide motive. So never give in to the self-defeating urge to give excuses for balls dropped and wrong turns made. And while you’re at it, don’t accept them from others either. Hold yourself and others accountable for the decisions you and they make. Be compassionate, forgiving and patient as we all learn to accept responsibility for our choices, but intolerant of the excuses we may try to irresponsibly hide behind in the meantime.
6. Be Intolerant of GossipIf you are not intolerant of gossip you will become a steppingstone for it to spread its social damage. Gossip not shared but tolerated is fueled. Refuse to tolerate it. Stop it dead in its tracks. Ask for evidence. Make those dishing it out explain themselves. Suggest going to the person being gossiped about for their side as a concerned friend or neighbor or associate. Be the person responsible for killing the words that whisper and sneak behind backs and cowardly hide behind anonymity. Gossip is a form of cowardice. Cowardice dies in the light. Shine the light.
7. Be Intolerant of TimewastersThe respect you have for yourself and others can be seen in the way you treat your time and theirs. Don’t get me wrong, socializing and recreation are not wastes of time. They are essential to renew and befriend and experience many of life’s little joys. But to spend hours on end in no particular endeavor, as a pattern of repeated behavior, stealing the moments otherwise available for more meaningful activities is to fundamentally misunderstand what life was meant to be … and, most tragically, what you could have become and accomplished had time been used more wisely.
8. Be Intolerant of IngratitudeIngratitude is a particularly ugly form of selfishness. It’s taking others’ kindness for granted, indifferent to their thoughtfulness.
Ingratitude is intolerable because it fails to recognize the humanity of the person who has done something kind. Even Jesus asked the 10th leper where the other nine were he had healed when the 10th was the only one to thank him. Help people grow by gently and lovingly and compassionately reminding them to express gratitude more freely. You will be helping them lay a foundation for greater and deeper and more consistent levels of happiness. Still, the most effective way to encourage gratitude in others is to be grateful yourself. Lead by example, not in spite of it.
9. Be Intolerant of Self-condemnationThe words we use when we talk to ourselves or about ourselves matter tremendously. They matter because our words tend to gel into belief. And belief sets the parameter for action. We will never do what we are sure can never be done. So our self-talk, the tone and words and meaning we use in our internal dialogue, shapes us, affecting (sometimes infecting) our attitudes and reactions to life. When we criticize and condemn, we start to believe we’re less, unworthy, inevitable screw-ups and good for very little. Don’t tolerate it. Correct it. Argue against it. Push the little whiny weasel into the corner and out the backdoor … then lock it! And never allow the weasel back in. Tolerate mistakes and human imperfection. Don’t tolerate the self-abusive contempt we sometimes internalize when we inevitably stumble.
10. Be Intolerant of FearFear of bee stings is a good thing if you’re deathly allergic and standing at the edge of a field of flowers swarming with the little buggers as a friend (or enemy?) waves you out into the field. But it’s not a good thing if it keeps you from ever going outside. Context and degree are important factors to consider when evaluating the psychological health of your fear. But here are a few basic questions that should help:
• Is it tearing you apart from the inside?
• Is it harming relationships, self-esteem, self-respect, work performance or otherwise getting in the way?
• Is it chronic and debilitating?
• Does it control you?
• Is it overwhelming?
History of the French FryFrench Fries are one of many foods whose name is most misleading, as the origins of this fat fried food seem to be in Belgium. The story of their creation can be found in a family manuscript dated 1781, which reveals that potatoes were originally cut into the shape of fish and served in lieu of the fish normally caught in a series of small villages in Belgium.It seems the river had frozen over and the fish they normally caught and fried were unable to be caught. Why they’re called French is often attributed to troops coming over during World War I who got their hands on Belgian Fries. The official language of the Belgian army at that time was French, and as a result the men thought they were in France rather than Belgium. Interestingly, in that region of the world, they are still called “Flemish Fries” to further complicate matters. Now these treats are loved the world round, even becoming the ‘national snack’ of the Netherlands.
How to Celebrate French Fries DayWith the popularity of French Fry, it’s not surprising that the world has come up with as many different varieties of this delicious food as you could imagine. So, one of the best ways to celebrate French Fries Day is to host a party dedicated to celebrating the international menu the fried potato has created. The simplest variation is simply to put chopped raw onions in some ketchup and eat them up like they do in the Netherlands. For the more adventurous, try some of the varieties below!
American Bacon Cheeseburger ClassicThere is little Americans love more than to add cheese and bacon to just about anything. French fries are no exception, there is little that is as well-loved as a rich, greasy accompaniment to any meal. To make this classic you start with a basic of fries, and layer on bacon, chopped onions, cheese, and ground hamburger before tossing them in the oven just long enough for everything to get melty. Then grab a handful and dig in!
Greek French FriesThe Mediterranean rarely fail at making an already delicious food rich and full of the smells of home. If you love the classic Greek flavors of parmigiano-reggiano or romano cheese, garlic, and oregano, then these fries are going to leave you smiling. The key ingredients here are Extra Virgin Olive Oil to fry them in, after which you toss them in garlic salt, Greek Oregano, and your choice of cheese such as those mentioned ahead. To get the full impact you’re going to want to stick to the white crumbly cheese of the region, the truly adventurous might use Mazithra cheese.
These are a few dishes that can help enhance French Fries Day, and really bring out the amazing versatility of this centuries old treat. So, get out your deep frier, chop up some potatoes, and celebrate French Fries Day by eating yourself into a starch filled stupor!
Is a traditional seasoned grilled meat for the Feast of St. Bart. While stationed in Belgium many years ago with my young daughter Nicole there were none of the American fast food places in close vicinity, but there were frites stands. Nicole loved Belgium frites, which are “French Fries” with an attitude. We use to joke that someday we will open our own Frite stand and on the placard we would proudly proclaim the name of our stand, “DICK AND NIC’S FRITES AND SHASLIKS”.